Minister's Message

June 2003

As we approach the summer with all its busy-ness and fun, do you realize that this is all built on trust? Trust that the weather will be pleasant, trust that our world will be there if we choose to skip out for an afternoon or weekend, trust that as we graduate or marry that future will live up the promises made. Well, this relates to churches as well. We have to trust that our faith community will be there when we return from our summer vacation, trust that the Board and Search Team will have done their jobs in preparing us and selecting qualified candidates for the interview process in July-August, and trust in each other enough to ante-up to do what it takes for us to take the next leap.

M. Scott Peck talks about the life of community as moving from pseudo-community through crisis into "real" community. In that time of crisis, trust is what has to be built or re-built for the next step to occur.

William Bridge's Managing Transitions talks about how to build trustworthiness:

• Do what you say you will do. Don't make promises you can't or won't keep. Most people's trust problems have been learned from untrustworthy actions in the past.
• Listen to people carefully and tell them what you think they are saying. If you have it wrong, accept the correction and revise what you say. People trust others whom they believe understand them.
• Understand what matters to people and work hard to protect whatever is related to that. People trust those who are looking out for their best interests.
• Share yourself honestly. Hiding shortcomings may improve your image, but it doesn't build trust. Admitting an untrustworthy action is itself a trustworthy action. A lot of mistrust begins when people are unable to read you.
• Don't try to push others to trust you further than you trust them. Your own mis-trust will be communicated subtly and will return to you in kind. Trust is mutual or it's shallow.
• If all this is too complicated to remember and you want a single key to building trust, just remind yourself to "Tell the truth."

Well, it's time to tell you the truth. I'm feeling worried, needing some reassurance from this community that you are willing to ante-up and do what it takes to interview and move a minister here. If we are going to be here in the fall with a new minister, there are some things that I believe you can do to help us get there.

Your support this summer - your prayers (positive thoughts about Now and Then) AND your presence (numbers don't lie - when we have candidates in - they can count!) AND the financial resources to continue to operate this summer and cover the costs of maybe as many as three interviews -- approximately a $1000 a weekend and then moving costs - estimated to be at minimum $7,000. God is our Source and YOU are the bringers into manifestation of the Divine Ideas. Show up, hold hands, and confront the reality of this experience with love and light and wisdom and trust! Together we can do it . . . separately it's just too big an idea for any one of us to pull off.

I love you enough to tell you the truth and I'm willing hold your hand as we move through this next stage in our journey of faith together. It's easy - when we're willing!

Reverend Marylou Palmer
minister@unityofappleton.org